The Mrs. Rev Podcast: Valentines Day Special: Love Truths

The world has very different expectations of Love and marriage than God does. This week, we are talking about Love Truths and understanding these truths and the Word of God will help you have healthy, life-giving relationships.

LOVE Truths

L - Are you Lonely, or are you Alone?

Whether you are married or single, you have to understand that there is a difference between being lonely and being alone. When you are alone, you do not have anyone physically around you. Loneliness is the feeling of being isolated and without support or companionship. You can be married and still feel lonely, or you can be single and not feel lonely. 

Loneliness comes from having a place in your life where you are not fully whole. If you are married, your spouse cannot fix your loneliness, only God can. If you are not married, a relationship will not make you feel less lonely. In fact, loneliness is something that pushes us into bad relationships. It makes us worry that we won’t find the right one and fear begins to drive our relationship decisions.

When you try to look for someone to fill an empty space in your life, you will attract another broken person. Two broken people do not make one whole person, so you will not find a solution to your loneliness in your relationship. When two whole people are in a relationship, they are moving toward God, and as they move toward God, they move toward each other. 

If you are single, take time to devote yourself fully to the Lord and spend time with Him. Being single is a special season, but it does not have to be a lonely one. If you are married and struggling with feelings of loneliness, take some time alone with God and ask Him to show you any area where you need to release forgiveness or mature in order to be whole. Then, and only then, will you be able to find fulfillment.

O - Only one

God has ONE person set aside for you. If you are not yet married, tell God what you want in a future spouse and ask Him to protect your future spouse and to help him grow in maturity and in favor with God and mn. When you are specific, you will know that when that person comes into your life that they are a gift from God. If you married, recognize that you already have your “one” and ask God to show you how to be the best wife you can be so that you can help him and meet every one of his needs and desires.

In addition to praying for the one person that you are going to be with or that you already are married to, you need to recognize yourself as someone else’s “only one.” Be modest. Don’t flirt with people you are not married to or give away your heart.

For single women: What boundaries can you draw in your life so that you are saving your heart for the man you will marry? Do you know what you are praying for? Spend some time asking God to show you what you want in a spouse and pray for them so that when temptation arises, you can remember what you are waiting for.

V - Don’t fall prey to Valentines syndrome

Valentine’s Syndrome is when you are constantly measuring your relationship against a fairytale or a fantasy that you see on TV or in a book or movie. These are not real relationships! If you compare your relationships to them, you will be disappointed and become discontent. Remember, the grass is not greener on the other side, it is greenest where you water it. 

If you are married, measure your relationship against the word of God! Specifically, against God’s definition of Love in 1 Corinthians 13.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. - 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a

You and your spouse are still growing, so sometimes you will have character flaws that need to be worked out. It does not mean you made a mistake or that you are outside of God’s will.

Your relationship is not going to look like anyone else’s love story. You get to create your own love story. So, you will also need to make sure that you are investing in your relationship, not just withdrawing. Focus on building up your spouse and speaking his love language. When you focus on what you can give, your spouse will reciprocate and you will begin to build the love story you want.

For married women: What do you see the movies that you do wish was in your relationship? Is it realistic? Communicate with your spouse about what makes you feel loved and ask him what makes him feel loved. Pray together and thank God for helping you build your own, unique, love story.

E - Examine your relationships

If you are unmarried, you should constantly be evaluating your relationships so that you do not awaken love before it is time (Song of Solomon 8:4). When you are dating before you are ready to get married, you are giving away a part of your heart and robbing yourself of time to mature and spend time alone with the Lord. You also increase the amount of sexual temptation in your life. Don’t date to date. Date to marry.

When you are dating and you want to know if they are “the one,” you will need to stay away from sexual sin, because that will make it harder hear the voice of God on that issue. Spend time praying and asking God what to do. When they are the right person, your callings and passions will line up, and their character will line up with the principles of God’s word.

God wants you to have thriving, amazing relationships. God has given you a gift, a partner. That covenant that you have is between you, your husband, and God. Remember that love is more than a feeling and an emotion, and everything you need to love is found in the Word of God.

Pray this: Father, thank you for being my source of fulfillment, and thank you for having one person set apart for me. Help them to know you better every day and to submit their will to you. Furthermore, help me become the perfect one for my spouse (or future spouse). Reveal to me any areas where I need to grow so that I can be the best spouse I can be. God, I trust you with my marriage.