Counter-Cultural Family

What does it look like to go against the grain with your family in 2023? What does it mean to deviate from the norms of mainstream society? When the world says you have to fit in a specific mold, you need to use the word of God to set your values.

“Do not love the world nor the things it offers you, for when you love the world, you do not have the love of the Father in you. 1 John 2:15

What does counter-cultural mean? It is a sub-culture whose values and norms deviate from mainstream society. When the world says you have to fit in a certain mold, you know you need to use the word of God to define your life. There is a difference between operating in the world and in the kingdom of God. They are two different conflicting kingdoms.

In John 14, we are told to be in this world but not of this world. Yes, we have to function here, but we can still operate in a different spirit or culture. You do not have to put a bubble around yourself and not interact with those living in the world. God calls us to shine our light in the darkness.

Wherever you set your foot, whether in sports or school, you must let your light shine and be authentic. My family has a saying that “We are full-time Christians and part-time everything else. This means we do not see a different version of ourselves at church versus everywhere else. We consistently love Jesus and each other no matter where we are.

Do not think it is hopeless if your family currently lives by the world’s standards. The grace of God is so good that he will meet you where you are, teach you, and empower you to implement simple principles to get your family back on track. Read the tips below on how to help your family live a counter-cultural life.

1.     Stay value focused. 

What are your values? How you are living and what you prioritize speak your values. There is nothing wrong with participating in sports and activities, but make sure you control the situation. Make sure your value system prioritizes the house of God. We want our kids to be happy. We learn that from God, who is a good and perfect Father. But you must decipher the word good. It means well-rounded decisions to lead our family to the values God has established for us. Do not let happiness guide you. Let your values guide you.

Make sure your lifestyle is not driven by busyness. We don’t even have the time for our values because we are sucked into the current of the world. We have every good intention to start the new year prioritizing God, and then we become so busy. Those busy moments are when we compromise or take the easy way out. Once you establish your values, ensure your schedule allows you to stick to these values.

2.     Stay consistent.

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6:9

You must stay consistent with your family. You do not talk about your values once, and then you are done. It takes consistency.  It is never too late to start sowing good seeds. Don’t let the enemy tell you it is too late or holds you hostage by your past decisions. Keep sowing because you will reap the proper harvest. Don’t get discouraged. Start sowing the right seed and turn around your family values.

3.     Reinstate the table and the prayer circle in your home.

Make it a point to gather around the table together. Jesus did a lot of his ministry around the table. Statistics prove that the lack of eating dinner together as a family has had a dramatic negative effect on our family. There is something spiritual and authentic at the table, breaking bread and sharing about the day. Make it a goal to institute a family dinner, no matter what it looks like. Start with 20 minutes at the table.

Starting a prayer circle in your family is another step towards establishing your values. Gathering as a family and praying, discussing a scripture, or doing a devotion together reestablishes your values. It doesn’t have to look perfect or be hours long.

It is good to evaluate and take time to reinstate values. God has given us the responsibility and power to bring change in all things. It is time to return to family values.